SNIPER MODE – a trance like state

 

I watch my cat when he has spotted a mouse.  He will sit there completely focussed on the hole the poor critter has taken refuge in for hours.   SNIPER MODE

Do we ever do that? Well for sure.  I have a snake phobia so if I’m near long grass I go into SNIPER MODE.  Not for a tasty meal like my cat but for self-preservation.  I will be sort of listening to you, sort of enjoying my picnic, but not really because I am in SNIPER MODE and completely focussing all my senses on that long grass for a movement, a sound.  Its like I am in a trance, in that I am pretty well unaware of anything else going on around me.

Now I could just move away from the long grass and then I would be able to release my senses from guard duty to really listen to the conversation and taste my food and feel the sun on my back and notice the beauty around me.  But what if you can’t move away from the perceived threat?

Fight or flight response.  Fight or run.  Great if you can but what if the perceived threat isn’t physical? What if it’s a thought or a prediction about an upcoming event?

This is how we get so run down, when we go into SNIPER MODE on a perceived or possible threat …

– a big bill coming in at the end of the month we don’t know how we are going to pay

– a meeting that’s looming that we are really concerned about

– a fear that our partner may be looking elsewhere

– anything emotional really

And the problem is you can’t move away from those threats or perceived threats because they are in your head and so follow you!  And you go in to SNIPER MODE totally unable to really notice anything going on around you but the perceived threat, moving through your days but not being in them, not enjoying or noticing any of the great things happening around you.

You are in SNIPER MODE.

And it’s exhausting to be so alert to danger, to be able to do nothing about it. And it wears you down and then you feel poorly and tired which makes the perceived threat even more of a problem.

Would you know if you had slipped into SNIPER MODE?

Whatever your fear or perceived threat is you have a couple of choices:  accept that from now till the great event you can stay in SNIPER MODE. Let whatever the perceived threat is take away your senses.  So very exhausting and it changes nothing but your health and ability to deal with the perceived threat if it ever turns out to be real.

Or you can smell the flowers, being in the moment and notice the good things and beauty around you.

Neither makes time pass any quicker but how would you rather spend your time?

If this is you, get in contact and let me help you choose how you want to feel, how you want to spend you time.

Taking time to think. Taking time for you

Taking time for you

All I have read and heard about in the media over the last period is about the stress, anxiety and emotional wellbeing of people and how everything is getting too much.  I have also seen an increase in the number of my clients coming to me with related issues.

If an issue is so big its very difficult to be in the ‘moment’.  Or if that phone keeps ringing, people keep asking you questions or you have a full diary you may not have the any time to think.  And that’s important.

I have been very lucky to be able to take time away from the phone, from actual work, and from other people to appreciate the beauty around me but to also give me time to think and arrange my thoughts, to plan my year ahead and to do something that I really enjoy – fishing.

I can’t recommend enough doing something you love or enjoy.  Taking time for you.

 

All Behaviour Serves a Purpose

Behaviour

If we waste time trying to change a behaviour without recognising that the behaviour is as a result of an emotional reaction to something, we will be wasting a lot of time!

Beneath every behaviour is an emotion that created it.  Why? Well the behaviour is trying to voice the emotion or help it in some way.   An example would be:  ‘I feel sad, empty unloved’  The answer ..CAKE!  Okay that is a bit of a sweeping example but its what we do when an emotion is unhappy, not at ease with itself.  That’s why I love the word, DIS-EASE!

Getting to the Root

Traditional therapy spends a lot of time giving you strategies to change a behaviour. Sometimes that works but if you really want to deal with the issue stop pruning branches and go for the root!

Emotions

I can’t change a past event or make your current situation better in any material way.  I can’t find you a nicer husband, better job, well behaved kids, but I can help you deal with all of that by working with you to find the emotion behind all the things that are causing you DIS-EASE.

We create our realities, we choose how to think and feel, we are responsible for how we think and feel, and so if your struggling with something right now, you can spend a lot of time and money trying to change the behaviour the feeling of DIS-EASE has created.  Or you can go to the root, find the underpinning emotion that created the feeling and ask it ‘Why?’  Help it, and if it feels listened too and understood it will quieten down.

Its all about you!

You have have the answers inside you

In a School this week introducing how we can manage our emotions rather than be controlled by them to children from the age of 6 to 11, I came across a quote that really sums it all up.

“There is a soul bird who lives inside us all.
This special bird has the keys to our innermost emotions and feelings. It knows the secret places where we hide away our happiness, anger, joy, jealousy and sorrows.
Are you ready to listen to your soul bird?”
Michal Snunit.

Then today I received a beautiful letter from a client:

I don’t know if you realise just how much you help people like me.

You asked me for a hug and we then went on a journey that for me has given me back the freedom to do the things other people take in their stride – going up and down stairs, using escalators, crossing bridges, getting on and off trains.  Those and more were my phobias.

I honestly don’t know what you did that day, but you told me I would feel different for the next few days.  I left you and as I drove home I felt a weight lifted from me – I felt lighter and nothing ‘got to me’.

I did things my ‘problem’ had instilled in me without thinking.    I walked over bridges and calmly walked up and down unknown stairs to see the penguins with my precious granddaughter aged 3.

I know I can tell xxxx “I’ve got this, I’m ok” and I will be ok.

Thank you just doesn’t seem enough for what you have given back to me.  SMH

This lady found her inner soul bird, her emotions, her Super Power that helped her overcome her phobias and allowed her to spend time with her granddaughter doing those special things, experiencing that special time.  All I did was show her a path to that soul bird, her Super Power, her emotions.  She did the rest.

NLP Award Finalist – Alison Knowles

NLP Award Finalist

Wow what an accolade! Ali has been nominated for an international award for NLP training in Education.

She has been been selected, from those nominated, by an independent panel.  The finalists have been chosen on the how they have demonstrated the use of NLP in making a marked difference in the specified area.

The review below explains why Ali has been nominated.

“I met Ali a year ago and she has done so much to transform my family’s lives for the better since then. I couldn’t think of anyone better placed to be nominated for (and maybe to win!) an All in the Mind award.

I was recommended Ali for my son who was dealing with anxiety about 11+ exams. Ali dispensed with those problems in our first free Skype session and went on to help my son with the social problems he was having at school. In a few months he went from dreading school to actively looking forward to going in, and ended the school year winning the school talent contest and with a headmistress’s award for a great attitude towards school.

Amazed by my son’s transformation I apprehensively introduced Ali to my 8 year old daughter, who has been struggling with trichotillomania for around 3 years. She had had a string of therapists – all of whom had been ineffectual – but I was beginning to feel that if anyone could help, Ali could. My daughter was a difficult proposition, she is smart and manipulative and wised up to all the tricks in every therapists’ book. Ali recognised this immediately and also saw that my daughter’s biggest problem was that she was addicted to the attention she got from therapists and therefore had no motivation to stop pulling her hair out. Fast forward 6 months and Edie has gone nearly 40 days without pulling – a personal record.

Ali has a gift – she is not only incredibly astute about the root cause of different children’s problems but she uses her knowledge to reach different personalities in different ways, uniquely mixing her personal blend of “Ollie and his Superpowers”, hypnotherapy and NLP. Her methods seem so simple but the best ideas – the ones that can actually revolutionise the way we do things – almost always are.

Ali has helped me so much personally as well – not only through helping my children to become so much happier and fulfil their potential – but also by recognising that I needed help myself with the anxiety, negativity and perfectionism that was clouding my judgement about my children and myself. I really can speak from first hand experience about the way Ali appears to ‘see through’ a person and unlock the root cause of their ‘baggage’ – the kind so many of us have and that stops us from getting the most out of our lives.

I don’t know where myself or my family would be today without Ali. She has helped us immeasurably and I truly think she’s some sort of therapist genius (between my children and I we have seen at least 7 other therapists and one time or another so I have points of comparison!)

I hope Ali/Ollie and his Superpowers wins this award because I know that her dream is to help as many children as possible at as little cost as possible, and this award would bring that dream a step closer to becoming a reality.”  Polly

To find out more about training with Alison please go to https://www.ollieandhissuperpowers.com/pages/become-an-ollie-coach

Amazing results from the Hypno Hut – customer reviews

Customer Reviews

My job is about helping you be the best you can be.  So when I get feedback of how people have been able to change * their lives it makes me smile, getting that warm feeling inside.

I just wanted to share with you two very different clients feedback.

Just wanted to drop you a line to thank you for all your help. 

 The results I’ve achieved have surpassed my expectations and I’ve really enjoyed our sessions. 

 Each time I’ve come away relaxed and almost elated. The mind, when lead by an expert like yourself, is complex and powerful and I’ve enjoyed experimenting with mine. 

 I’m not quite ready to levitate, but I now know that if I want to I can, because I can achieve anything. 

 Thanks again. I will see you again before my op. And I really look forward to that visit. 

 

Just letting you know I haven’t smoked since our meeting last Tuesday and have no intention of ever smoking again. Can’t put into words how greatful I am.

 

Remember – All behaviour serves a purpose

 

  * Disclamer:  results may vary from person to person

Childhood shapes us – all behaviour serves a purpose!

All Behaviour serves a purpose

Anyone else watching the re runs of the classic “Birds of a Feather”?

Tonight’s episode is about Sharon and Tracy getting an invite to a school reunion. The invite comes from a lady that used to bully Sharon at school. This bully put Sharon in a dust bin and sat on the lid for hours. Classic comedy but very good.  Sharon declares that she eats so much due to that trauma, her subconscious is protecting her by making sure she can’t fit in a dust bin again!.  Class!

But the thing is, she could be a client that has come to me for help with comfort eating and weight loss. Only by working with a client and getting to the initial emotional event that caused the issue can we deal with it. This is just comedy but the truth is, just by uncovering an event from your past, that you may not connect to, allows you to look at the event and subsequent behaviour as an adult and realize in Sharon’s case that its highly unlikely anyone is going to try and put her in a bin today.  So she really does not need to eat so match to make sure it does not happen again.

Comedy moment!  Comedy explanation of comfort eating but a very good example of how your subconscious joins the dots and creates behaviours that made sense to you as a child but are completely inappropriate and unnecessary today.  And often the memory is blurred if the event was a negative one.

This sounds very, very simplistic but a client comes to me with a phobia or a habit that is holding them back in some way. Working together to get to the memory of the event that created the presenting issue is amazing to watch.  It’s a real light bulb moment for a client and often just understanding why they do what they do is enough to stop the behaviour permanently *.

All behaviour serves a purpose

Obviously some early year traumas cannot be dealt with so lightly.  But even in those cases, once a client understands why they react or behave in a certain manner it’s like watching a huge cloud lift off them. *

Birds of a Feather – one of my better memories.

 

  * Disclaimer:  results may vary from person to person

Ali nominated for a Best You Award

Nominee-BadgeThe Best Personal Development Author

Ali has been nominated for The Best Personal Development Author Award with the winner to be announced at the The Best You Gala ceremony on the 4th March 2017.

The award is in recognition of the most talented author that demonstrates an outstanding degree of groundbreaking achievement in Personal Development.  Ali was nominated for Ollie and his Super Powers. Knowles-Wiltshi_Ollie-and-His-S_978-1-78592-049-3_colourjpg-webhttps://www.ollieandhissuperpowers.com/

For more information about the 2017 awards, the expo or to book  tickets to the Gala event please go to  https://thebestyouexpo.com/awards/

Ali would like to thank everyone who nominated her.

What part of you makes you behave as you do

What Part of you?

People come to the hut with an identity created by their issues – so I get “I’m, depressed, I’m an alcoholic, I’m over weight, I have no motivation, I have low self-worth etc.

URM………. My attitude is you are none of those things.  They are not who you are but they are what you’re doing at the moment. I also believe all behaviour serves a purpose, so there must be a purpose behind the way you are behaving. Most of the time that behaviour although in its self-debilitating in some way, I believe, its actually trying to protect you in some way.

Think about it.  Drinking to make stuff go away, comfort eating, not daring to try or look forward…

I truly believe that our behaviours are actually trying to help but that that help often causes more issues. A bit like taking anti-depressants to keep you on an even kill.  The intent is good but the outcome is rarely a desired solution state.

Behaviours are, in my mind, created by emotion.  Emotions are the things that make us unique individuals. With children, I call these emotions superheroes to give them substance and so I can dissociate the issue from the child. In adults I call them ‘parts of us’.

By very simply asking the part of you called depressed, or the part that thinks it’s got no confidence or the part that want to eat cake “what its problem is?”  The key being what IT’S problem is not what your problem is.  It never seizes to amaze me or my client what jumps into their minds!

I have low self-worth – well how can that be helping you?

I can’t stop eating cakes – how is that helping you?

I am depressed – how is that helping you?

Often the client can’t answer and just says it’s not!

But if I ask the part of them why it’s being so controlling – it’s amazing what comes out

I have no self-worth – well if I keep myself thinking that I won’t try so cant fail like last time when….

I can’t stop eating cakes – well if I keep eating cakes I feel loved close mum used to give me sweets and cakes when I was sad so………..

I am depressed – well if I stay depressed I won’t expect and won’t be disappointed again like last time when….

Generalisations but you get my drift.

All behaviour serves a purpose and that purpose is trying to protect you.

I don’t waste your time trying to make you laugh or stop eating cakes, quick fixes that solve the effect but don’t deal with cause. I work with you to help you with the issue doing what you do is protecting you from. Parts therapy is powerful because it starts straight away by making what you are struggling with part of you not all of you, freeing you from that identity, so you can look at the issue its trying to block out. *

 * disclaimer: results may vary from person to person

Why try Hypnotherapy

Well let’s start with what is hypnosis?

To be hypnotised is to be in a trance state. To be trapped in a behaviour or thought.  Think about what your struggling with right now, a habit you want to kick, a fear or phobia that controls you – well that’s you in a trance,

My job as a” hypnotherapist” is to break you out of that trance state. Set you free from it.

But in order to do that we have to understand why you created the trance state in the first place. I believe all behaviour serves a purpose. Consider a fear of dogs, when you see a dog you get anxious – that is your body protecting you.  That’s your amazing subconscious remembering an incident that created your phobia and doing its best to stop you being in any danger going forward, so it heightens your awareness of dogs and makes you anxious, creating a phobia.

So all though the phobia can be deliberating it’s actually designed to try and protect you.

So not only does all behaviour serve a purpose, it’s trying to serve a positive one!

To free you from that protective behaviour we have to understand where it came from and if it’s still a need in you to be so alert.

I do that by helping you revisit the initial event.  Cliché as it may sound it’s often something from your child hood because that when we are learning how to stay safe in our world.

More often than not, the first event that created your habit or fear or phobia was created in a much younger less capable, less aware you than you are today.

An example – let’s use the dog phobia…

A lady in her 40’s came to me as she has had a phobia of dogs all her life and wants to marry the love of her life but guess what? Yep he comes with two dogs!

Well, we spent some time going back to her initial event that created her fear. Her memory was of being little and being mauled by a huge dog!

Scary – no wander she has a phobia!

Through NLP language techniques we were able to find the true event in her memory. I say true because every time we bring up a memory we change it without knowing it. You see you and but you cannot think like you did as a child because you know more, you are more worldly wise, you are bigger, stronger.

So every time you remember something you will be adding your current belief systems to that event.

When we cut through that and actually got this lovely lady to travel back down her life line to the event and watch as if watching a movie, what we say was a young girl in the park and an overzealous puppy bounding up to lick her but because she was small it toppled her over and she hurt her arm as she fell. 

As an adult watching this she realised that the dog was not trying to maul her, in fact it did not really hurt her at all – it was just because she was so little.

The lovely lady realised instantly that that could not happen again – a puppy could not knock her over, the dog was only playing….

She is still mindful of big dogs but I am happy to report that she has let go of her phobia of all dogs and wedding bells are ringing again.

All behaviour serves a purpose and usually a protective one, but the key is that that behaviour was created in a time and place and circumstance that doesn’t exist now and cannot exist now.

 * Disclaimer: results may vary from person to person